E3 HYPE TRAIN 2.0: Xbox One Owners Get The Shaft

Coming out of this morning's Microsoft E3 2016 press conference, I keep coming back to one conclusion: we should all sell our Xboxes.

Not because it was a bad showing. On the contrary - ReCore looks as cool as I could have hoped, Scalebound looks even cooler and has co-op, and even washed-up old Gears of War (now on #4, which is actually #5) got me excited to play Microsoft games coming soon. But it's obvious the Xbox One I bought last year, which released in just 2013, will be the absolute worst way to do that.

Here's what we could do instead:

1. Buy an Xbox One S

Personally, I'm not interested in Xbox One S, which follows a long and storied tradition of releasing sleeker, feature-enhanced retools of consoles halfway through their life cycles. Other than 4K video, the differences between S and the Xbox I own are bells and whistles like a smaller frame and integrated power source. If you want to spend $300 on those, more power to you, but read on first.

2. Buy a new gaming PC
Play Anywhere will make PC gaming better than ever, but it's taking most of Xbox's appeal with it.

Debuted this morning, Play Anywhere is a new service from Microsoft that lets customers play selected games on Xbox One or PC, transferring save data and playing with the same friends on both. The more-important implication of this is that every new Xbox One exclusive is now a PC game too. Had I known that would happen, I wouldn't have bought an Xbox One in the first place.

This is probably what I'll do, especially because I have not only a PC but PlayStation 4 and Wii U - which have actual exclusive games. I would recommend it to most people who don't have those.

3. Wait for Project Scorpio
The only exception is if you're determined not to fiddle with the notoriously-finicky PC gaming scene. Then you can feel good about your Xbox One or Xbox One S purchase, right?

Yeah, not really.

Every Xbox owner should be terrified by "beyond generations."

That's because of Project Scorpio, which is due fall 2017. Not Xbox Two, Scorpio promises to use the same games and accessories as Xbox One and Xbox One S but deliver a higher-fidelity experience, and this upgrade's actually for real: better graphics, higher frame rates and an all-around better gaming experience.

Scorpio is an unprecedented step for a console manufacturer, but it should sound awfully familiar to anyone who owns a smartphone (so basically anyone). After all, iPhone 6 is pretty much the same device as iPhone 4; what's the problem with bringing that model to consoles?

The problem is that smartphones are, for most of us, not a luxury purchase like an Xbox. Even if you don't use it for work, your smartphone can do literally millions of things - send and receive phone calls and text messages, run myriad other communication apps, shoot photos and video, track physical activity, serve as a quick-and-dirty VR headset, and oh yeah, play games. You can even make a feature film on the damn thing.

To impose the same cost structure on a device with a fraction of the utility is a horrible proposition for consumers. Do you really want to buy another $400 Xbox every three years?

Microsoft knows this: it insists "nobody will be left behind" when Scorpio comes out, that it will be a luxury device for the Xbox player who doesn't mind laying down a little extra cash for the premium experience. The problem is that Microsoft is either lying or hopelessly naive.

Suppose every Xbox One game is actually released for both Scorpio and the base system - and previous upgrades like the New Nintendo 3DS heavily suggest that's not true. They certainly won't be optimized equally. How did that work out for Middle-Earth: Shadow of Mordor?

If Microsoft is really devious, they'll follow another part of that iPhone upgrade process:

1. Consumer buys iPhone 1.
2. Consumer buys Game A for iPhone 1.
3. Consumer moves on to Games B, C, and on.
4. iPhone 2 and 3 are released.
5. Customer buys iPhone 2 or 3.
6. Games X, Y and Z aren't compatible with iPhone 1.
7. No one notices because they don't have iPhone 1 anymore.

The problem, of course, is that customers don't think about video game consoles like phones, which are evolving rapidly, more prone to break and thus better candidates for rapid replacement. We want consoles to just work, for as long as possible. Step 7 is absolutely not going to happen with Xbox.

The takeaway is this: If you're interested in Project Scorpio, you should not buy a new Xbox One or S, and consider divesting yourself of your old Xbox ASAP. And if you are, you should buy Scorpio knowing Microsoft is likely to release another incremental upgrade in the near future.

And it will be your fault.